In die video Bob Newhart – STOP IT! speel Bob Newman as ‘n sielkundige wat ‘n pasiënt bloot sê dat sy moet stop waarvoor sy bang is.
Daar steek dalk meer waarheid hierin as wat ‘n mens wil erken…
Hier volg die woorde:
KATHERINE: Dr. Switzer?
DR. SWITZER (Bob Newhart): Yes, come in. I’m just washing my hands.
KATHERINE: I’m Katherine Bigmans. Janet Carlisle referred me.
DR. SWITZER: Oh, yes. You dream about being buried alive in a box.
KATHERINE: Yes, that’s me. Should I lay down?
DR. SWITZER: No, we don’t do that anymore. Just have a seat and let me tell you a bit about our billing. I charge five dollars for the first five minutes and then absolutely nothing after that. How does that sound?
KATHERINE: (Laughing) That sounds great. Too good to be true as a matter of fact.
DR. SWITZER: Well, I can almost guarantee you that our session won’t last the full five minutes. Now, we don’t do any insurance billing, so you would either have to pay in cash or by check.
KATHERINE: Wow. Okay.
DR. SWITZER: And I don’t make change.
KATHERINE: (laughing) All right.
DR. SWITZER: (Watching on his watch) Go.
KATHERINE: Go?
DR. SWITZER: Tell me about the problem that you wish to address.
KATHERINE: Oh, okay. Well, I have this fear of being buried alive in a box. I just start thinking about being buried alive and I begin to panic.
DR. SWITZER: Has anyone ever tried to bury you alive in a box?
KATHERINE: No. No, but truly thinking about it does make my life horrible. I mean, I can’t go through tunnels or be in an elevator or in a house, anything boxy.
DR. SWITZER: So, what you are saying is you are claustrophobic?
KATHERINE: Yes, yes, that’s it.
DR. SWITZER: All right. Well, let’s go, Katherine. I’m going to say two words to you right now. I want you to listen to them very, very carefully. Then I want you to take them out of the office with you and incorporate them into your life.
KATHERINE: Shall I write them down?
DR. SWITZER: No. If it makes you comfortable. It’s just two words. We find most people can remember them.
KATHERINE: Okay.
DR. SWITZER: You ready?
KATHERINE: Yes.
DR. SWITZER: Okay. Here they are. Stop it!
KATHERINE: I’m sorry?
DR. SWITZER: Stop it!
KATHERINE: Stop it?
DR. SWITZER: Yes. (spelling the words) S-T-O-P, new word, I-T.
KATHERINE: So, what are you saying?
DR. SWITZER: You know, it’s funny, I say two simple words and I cannot tell you the amount of people who say exactly the same thing you are saying. I mean, you know, this is not Yiddish, Katherine. This is English. Stop it!
KATHERINE: So I should just stop it?
DR. SWITZER: There you go. I mean, you don’t want to go through life being scared of being buried alive in a box, do you? I mean, that sounds frightening.
KATHERINE: It is.
DR. SWITZER: Then stop it!
KATHERINE: I can’t. I mean it’s —
DR. SWITZER: No, no, no. We don’t go there. Just stop it.
KATHERINE: So, I should just stop being afraid of being buried alive in a box?
DR. SWITZER: You got it. Good girl. (standing up from his chair) Well, it’s only been three minutes, so that will be three dollars.
KATHERINE: Actually, I only have five so —
DR. SWITZER: Well, I don’t make change.
KATHERINE: Then I guess I’ll take the full five minutes.
DR. SWITZER: Fine. All right. What other problems would you like to address?
KATHERINE: I’m bulimic. I stick my fingers down my throat.
DR. SWITZER: Stop it! Are you a nut of some kind? Don’t do that.
KATHERINE: But I’m compelled to. My mom used to call met fat —
DR. SWITZER: No, no. We don’t go there.
KATHERINE: But I —
DR. SWITZER: No, we don’t go there either.
KATHERINE: But my horoscope did say —
DR. SWITZER: We definitely don’t go there. Just stop it. What else?
KATHERINE: Well, I have self-destructive relationships with men.
DR. SWITZER: Stop it! You want to be with a man, don’t you?
KATHERINE: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm, yes.
DR. SWITZER: Well, then, stop it. Don’t be such a big baby.
KATHERINE: I wash my hands a lot.
DR. SWITZER: That’s all right.
KATHERINE: It is?
DR. SWITZER: I wash my hands all the time. There’s a lot of germs out there. Don’t worry about that one.
KATHERINE: I’m afraid to drive.
DR. SWITZER: Well stop it! How are you going to get around? Get in the car and drive you, you kook. Stop it!
KATHERINE: You stop it! You stop it!
DR. SWITZER: What’s the problem, Katherine?
KATHERINE: I don’t like this. I don’t like this therapy at all. You are just telling me to stop it.
DR. SWITZER: And you don’t like that?
KATHERINE: No, I don’t.
DR. SWITZER: So you think we are moving too fast, is that it?
KATHERINE: Yes. Yes, I do.
DR. SWITZER: All right. Then let me give you ten words that I think will clear everything up for you. You want to get a pad and a pencil for this one?
KATHERINE: All right.
DR. SWITZER: Are you ready?
KATHERINE: Mm-hmm.
DR. SWITZER: All right. Here are the ten words: Stop it or I’ll bury you alive in a box!
Hierdie is nou voorwaar ‘n goeie insetsel, en metafories dikwels sprekend van die moderne lewe van beide pasient en sielkundige. Die video laat mens nogal dink aan die hedendaagse kerk milieu met die ‘vrou’ as die dominee/pastoor, en ‘Bob Newhart’ as die ‘self’, en die ‘vrou’ sprekend as Bruid van Christus vasgevang in ‘n warboel van moderne invloede waarvan die psigiese identiteit opgebreek is.
Die tragedie is, dat die ‘moderne rasionele self’ nie eens naastenby dink hy/sy is eintlik die ‘pasiënt’ wat met ‘self’ in gesprek moet trëë nie. Die Bybel, veral die Ou Testament, sal uitstekende so ‘n ‘Bob Newhart-rol’ kan vervul na my mening. [https://cheapmodernity.substack.com/p/performative-man]
Ek lees hierdie interesante sekulêre artikel vanuit ‘Substack’, wat goedgunstig deur Google AI vertaal is. Mens merk hierdie groot gebrek aan diepte by wyse van die simptome duidelik; hiermee sekere uittreksels vanuit die artikel:
“Baie mans bou vandag ‘n beeld van hulself noukeurig as bedagsaam, gekultiveerd, emosioneel intelligent, moreel verfyn en ‘sielkundig bewus’. Hulle trek op ‘n spesifieke manier aan, praat in ‘n noukeurig saamgestelde stemtoon, haal filosowe en digters aan wat lankal oorlede is, kweek esteties en sosiaal-bevorderlik vriendskappe en beweeg binne sekere intellektuele of artistieke kringe.
Maar dikwels funksioneer hierdie gebare minder as die uitdrukkings van innerlike karakter, en eerder meer as vorme van ‘n sosiale belegging. Die mensdom word self gekommodifiseer. Verhoudings word transaksioneel, eerder as opreg. Mense word stilweg geëvalueer volgens hul bruikbaarheid: Wat kan hierdie persoon voorsien? Status? Validering? Plesier? Toegang? Verbindings? Bewondering? Emosionele gemak? Die moderne individu leer toenemend hoe om diepte te simuleer voordat hy leer hoe om dit te beliggaam…..
‘n Persoon kan deernisvol, emosioneel intelligent, progressief, gekultiveerd of moreel sensitief voorkom, terwyl hy psigies ‘verwyderd van ‘n ander mens’ staan, ‘sielkundig vermydend’ is, en fundamenteel transaksioneel bly in die behandeling van ander. Hierdie teenstrydigheid het diep filosofiese wortels….
Guy Debord het bespreek hoe die moderne sosiale lewe toenemend ‘n skouspel word.
Erich Fromm het ontleed hoe die moderne kultuur selfs liefde omskep in ‘n verbruiksaktiwiteit wat beheer word deur nut, uitruiling en eiebelang….
Moderne verhoudings weerspieël toenemend hierdie toestande.
Mense word uiteindelik weggegooi sodra die nuwigheid verdwyn of die emosionele verantwoordelikheid ongerieflik word.
Selfs vriendskappe kan subtiel transaksioneel word.
Sommige mense handhaaf sosiale kringe nie deur lojaliteit, opoffering of opregte besorgdheid nie, maar by wyse van bruikbaarheid: uitnodigings, status, netwerke, sosiale toegang, vermaak, professionele voordeel. En wanneer ongemak, ongemak, lyding of werklike verpligting voorkom, ontbind baie verhoudings stilweg. Nie noodwendig omdat hierdie individue bewustelik kwaadwillig is nie. Maar omdat hulle hulself opgelei het, om die lewe hoofsaaklik te evalueer deur persoonlike bevrediging en om sielkundige gemaksones na te streef.
‘n Persoon kan emosioneel goed artikuleer, terwyl hy moreel teenstrydig, eties twyfelagtig en sielkundig gefragmenteerd bly….Dit is miskien een van die stil tragedies van die moderne kultuur: mense leer toenemend hoe om (‘n vorm van) opregtheid uit te voer sonder om ten volle te verstaan wat opregtheid eintlik behels en vereis….Dit (opregtheid) kan nie verplaas word (na ander) met poësie, die intellektuele, ‘n noukeurig gekonstrueerde identiteit, emosionele taal of by wyse van kulturele verfyning nie.
Opregtheid verg standvastigheid. En standvastigheid verg karakter….”